Uh.... The Gas Pedal's the One on the Right

Well, believe it or not, I happen to be one of the 'Road-Rage-aholics' The Grammar Nazi recently attacked on her blog. Yes, I'm that irritated guy in the vehicle next to you, giving you the finger as I pass. Consider yourself lucky I didn't intentionally clip you as I passed, but hey, we're a considerate bunch.

I also creep forward once I notice the adjacent light has turned yellow, as I know this undoubtedly means mine will soon be turning green. (I caught on after the first 2 times I saw it, so why havn't YOU?!) In addition to this, if I'm alone on a 2-lane highway, I'll always take the inside of the corners. As I'm coming up on a set of lights I am unfamiliar with, I'm checking the light-poles nearby for those cameras. This way, I know whether I can run the red light without getting caught.

Yes, I turned into the second lane because there was one less person in it waiting for the light to change. I did this for a reason... Now I'm 12 feet further ahead than I would have been had I stayed in my original lane, so if the guy in front of me now decides to go slower than the guys in my original lane, I'm obviously going to get upset.

Oh, and don't get me started on those of you who have your cruise-control set at 113, passing the guy going 112.5. If I'm coming up behind you, I promise I'm not slowing down until I'm half a car length behind you. If you want to chill-out behind the wheel, then get out of the way, if not I'm gonna try to make you just as irritated with me as I obviously am with you.

So I will take it upon myself to speak for all those who have what many refer to as "Road Rage". How is it accepted that we must meet deadlines in every other facet of life, but somehow can take as long as we want to get from one location to another? I also wonder how driving can be the one thing people seem to continuously do, yet can never seem to get any better at. If you could do it in 25 minutes 3 years ago, then why can't you do it in 22 now? C'mon, you've seen that light turn from yellow to red 700 times... you have 5.2 seconds so use it... WHY ARE YOU STOPPING???

Bigfoot, Bison, & The Loch-Ness Monster

As some of you may know, I'm a bit of an explorer. I recently travelled to the Northwest Territories in search of the Bison. While the terrain there is rugged & very unsuitable for human life, it was all worth it to catch a glimse of the great bison-beast. I have posted a picture below:

Yes, they tend to blend-in with the background, but this picture is proof they exist. Due to this trip's success, I plan on going to the yukon next week in seach of the Yeti... I'll be sure to post the pictures.

My Love_Sexyback Live

Well, I've come to the realization that I will be unable to come up with a speach for The Philosopher's wedding. Rather, I will be performing the first 47 seconds of this video-post. If you don't see me online for the next month it's because I'm practising

When You Eat Your Smarties...

Well, you know what's coming. 'Do you eat the red ones last?'

I do. I actually think it shows a sort of understanding, patience, and optimism that the best is yet to come. In large part, it is a display of a part of what makes us human.

However, in the past few years I've begun starting to notice something... Something amiss... I havn't stopped using my technique, because I don't want to lose that part of myself, but I'm starting to accept that I may have to.

Just two days ago, Michelle & I are driving back from the NWT, and I'm munching on some Starburst I've laid out on the middle arm-rest. I go through my normal process, and am just popping the last crappy yellow candy into my mouth. 'Wait for it' I think to myself... And... Sure enough, as soon as that last yellow one is in my mouth I see it! A little hand scoots over from the other side of the truck and proceeds to start taking the good candies which are left.

Now I don't mind sharing, but this just goes to far... So I'll modify my human eating habits to better resemble those of wolves tearing at a carcas. Each one hurrying to get as much as he can before the next one finds the nice soft meat. Humanity is Doomed.